Sorry I've been out for so long. However, due to numerous complaints from friends etc. I'll try to be back up on the Blog from summer vk. well here's one funny from Gary P.

> After every flight, pilots fill out a form
called a gripe sheet,
> which conveys to the mechanics problems
encountered with the
> aircraft during the flight that need repair or
correction. The
> mechanics read and correct the problem, and
then respond in
> writing on the lower half of the form what
remedial action was
> taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets
before the next
> flight. Never let it be said that ground crews
and engineers
> lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual
logged maintenance
> complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas
pilots and the
> solution recorded by maintenance engineers.
>
> By the way, Qantas is the only major airline
that has never had
> an accident.
>
> (P = The problem logged by the pilot.)
> (S = The solution and action taken by the
engineers.)
>
> P: Left inside main tire almost needs
replacement.
> S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
>
> P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very
rough.
> S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
>
> P: Something loose in cockpit.
> S: Something tightened in cockpit.
>
> P: Dead bugs on windshield.
> S: Live bugs on back-order.
>
> P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a
200 feet per
> minute descent.
> S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
>
> P: Evidence of leak on right main landing
gear.
> S: Evidence removed.
>
> P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
> S: DME volume set to more believable level.
>
> P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to
stick.
> S: That's what they're there for.
>
> P: IFF inoperative.
> S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
>
> P: Suspected crack in windshield.
> S: Suspect you're right.
>
> P: Number 3 engine missing.
> S: Engine found on right wing after brief
search.
>
> P: Aircraft handles funny.
> S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly
right, and be serious.
>
> P: Target radar hums.
> S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
>
> P: Mouse in cockpit.
> S: Cat installed.
>
> P: Noise coming from under instrument panel.
Sounds like a
> midget pounding on something with a hammer.
> S: Took hammer away from midget.