Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Barry Bonds Breaks Home Run Record.....Rages Against Charges of Steriod Abuse....

Barry Bonds angrily denied allegations of steroid use today, smashing several airplanes and buses to underscore his claim of innocence.

A spokesman said a new book detailing Bonds' reputed steroid-shooting and gobbling will not affect his quest to amass the largest head in baseball history.

When asked by the media whether he was "ripped" on steroids at that moment, the giant Giants slugger responded by grabbing 5-9, 185-lb. shortstop Omar Vizquel, swinging him like a bat and knocking over several cameramen.

Bonds, who yesterday broke the Home Run Record previously held by Hank Aaron, said now that he has completed his life's goal may now retire and then die of liver failure and exploding testicles around September.

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